The course of true love never did run smooth

Much has been said — and romanticized — about love and the dream of a perfect relationship. We grow up with images of soulmates, grand proposals, eternal happiness, and storybook endings. But reality rarely follows a script.

William Shakespeare said it plainly centuries ago:

“The course of true love never did run smooth.”

And yet, most of us walk into love — and into marriage — expecting otherwise.

In 2015, over 48,000 divorces were granted in Australia. The divorce rate hovers at 45%, which means nearly half of all marriages do not last.

That’s not just a statistic. That’s real people, real pain, and real silence around a truth we don’t want to accept:
Falling in love is easy. Staying in love is sacred work.

On my recent wedding anniversary, I shared a photo of my husband and me, smiling — full of warmth, like any “happy couple” post. The responses poured in:

“Such a lovely couple!”
“You’re so lucky to have each other.”
“What’s the secret to a happy marriage?”

And while I’m grateful for the love, I must confess:
The secret isn’t finding the perfect partner.
It’s learning to see — and appreciate — the imperfect one you already have.

In the beginning, love feels effortless.
You count hours waiting for their call. Their quirks feel charming. Their flaws feel forgivable. You don’t “make time” — you exist in it, happily.

No wonder we call it falling in love — it happens without calculation, without caution. Love, in its first form, is a freefall. It doesn’t require effort. That’s what makes it so intoxicating.

But that phase doesn’t last — and it’s not supposed to.

Over time, every relationship enters a quieter, less glamorous phase.
The texts reduce. The phone calls feel obligatory.
The very things that once made you smile — their laugh, their messiness, their unpredictability — now make you sigh, or worse, snap.

This is the part no one tells you about.
The part where you don’t feel “in love.”
And you begin to wonder:

“Is this the right person?”
“Why don’t I feel that spark anymore?”

You remember how love used to feel. You crave that rush — and sometimes, you begin looking for it elsewhere.

That’s when the drift begins.

Some people escape into affairs. Others hide behind overworking, excessive hobbies, late nights, or even emotional withdrawal.
But here’s the truth:
The problem isn’t outside the relationship — it’s within it.

If you fall in love with someone new, it will feel magical again. But give it time, and the same cycle will repeat — unless you break the pattern within.

Staying in love is not a passive act.
It requires effort. And more importantly, it requires awareness.

You must understand that love shifts forms.
It goes from butterflies to boundaries.
From surprises to stability.
From poems to shared responsibilities.

And yes — it takes repeated effort to choose the same person, every day, even when they annoy you, bore you, disappoint you, or forget your favorite things.

Love isn't a riddle to solve. It’s a rhythm to maintain.

Like everything in life, love has patterns. And if we understand them — truly study and apply them — we can preserve what we built.

You don’t need perfection.
You need patience.
You need perspective.
And most of all — you need practice.

On this side of marriage, I know now:
Love isn’t the fireworks.
It’s the gentle light that stays on — even after the curtain falls.